Happily Ever After?

As kids, we read stories of kings and queens who struggled early-on in their life, and due to some strange twist everything ends on a happy note. The movies we grew up watching also have the hero and villian, or the lovers and the opposing parents and after some time and major drama, everything falls into place and we have a happy ending. Even in Ramyana, the story is almost over once Lord Rama is back to his kingdom and power. So, did he never have any problems after that? (Of course Sita's woes continued and that's a different debate altogether...) I am sure he had a ton of problems managing his kingdom, protecting his kingdom from invaders from outside and within. Just because its not part of the story, we think he had a great time ruling!

May be these things become so much part of us or may be because I specifically never came out of this dream world, I always subconsciously had set time goals after which there won't be any hiccups at all in life (Writing this line itself, I am embarrassed of my foolishness!) Obviously that's not the case. There are problems in life, professional goals, personal problems, financial hassles...There is never an end to this story...Then I ask myself what keeps so many people to put up with all these problems and still live?

It is joy derived from simple things in life...The sense of accomplishment when a professor says you are on top of your work...The peace we experience when holding hand of the person you love looking at the sea.. The joy we get out of doing some random acts of kindness...The out of the world feeling when meeting your family after some years...I guess it is things like these that re-fuel us..

Life is a journey as lot of people have already said and not a story that has a "happily ever after phase"....It is only slowly that I am understanding this... and rather strangely... I am not complaining!

In the office....

Okay, Who even thought I will be writing a blog post at 1:37 in the night from my office? I thought I would die before doing that!!!! Here I am waiting for someone else to integrate my code and whiling my time....Not even feeling sleeping sleepy anymore actually! Dunno if we work to live or live to work.....

Well this is probably the price we pay for choosing Engineering...Getting into this because of money or family pressure or peer pressure...Hold on....this is a really boring topic and I don't want to write about it....There have been so many lectures and movies on it...3 idiots also talked so much about it.....

I am trying to guess when I will reach home...may be 2:30...may be 3:30....Hmmm....
I dont even know why I am writing this post, but I am sure the next post would be a much better one :-)

Good Night to me!

Summer.....

Here comes another Summer...a warm beautiful summer to remind us that life is not just a never-ending chilly winter...This is also the time I miss eating the sour mango pickles, the sweeeet smell of jasmine flowers and the vibrant yellow flowered trees that you find on the streets of Hyderabad...

This season always reminds me of the vacations we used to take to our grand-parents village. When they were much younger and more healthy, I absolutely adored the amount of energy levels they had....especially my grandma. She was so enthusiastic about everything, playing with us, managing the daily chores, making our favorite food everyday, taking us out for movies to the nearest town, making a mala out of the jasmine flowers for me....The list is just endless. My grandpa used to talk to us more during the evenings....Lying down under the starry sky, he used to make up shapes by connecting a few stars and tell us a story behind it. He even used to recite a few 'padyams' praising babu towards the end! These memories come back to me so frequently this summer but not earlier..Probably 'coz now I have the time to think about all these.....Probably because my grandparents are no longer so enthusiastic owing to their health problems. I really miss those days and wish they were always the same!

Summer in the US is not that bad either....I love the flood of strawberries in Walmart, the vibrant tulips.....and just the fact that I don't have to wear a sweater anymore (Well.....at least for a few months I mean!)

Just wish people never aged and summer never died!

Fear!

I always used to think pain is the strongest emotion any human being can experience. May be that's why we remember all the movies which have a sad ending soo well....Happiness is never so complete or so strong because when we are happy, we think we deserve to be happy :-) But when something goes wrong, it stays in our mind for a very long time....but this week I realized I was wrong, FEAR is the strongest emotion of all....Fear that life will never get better, fear that life will always take a downturn, fear of losing the the most precious thing in our life.....I have been experiencing this for the last couple of weeks and this emotion was so strong and so hard to overcome.....It just stays in your mind even in your sleep! I am sooo glad that this phase is done and I am back to being normal.....I never want to live in fear again!

Zoom Out...

Well, starting the blog was not the only idea I got in the shower....I had a bad day at office yesterday, I mean not a lot of constructive work out of the day! So I was thinking how I should not have a repeat of yesterday and something just flashed....Dont try to Zoomin always, Zoomout as well. Yeah, this is not very descriptive, I know. I am working on images right now and for the problem I am trying to solve, I am close to getting the result. So, when I zoom out, the result looks pretty and makes me feel I am almost there. When I zoom in on the other hand, I see so many problems with my work and feel I am miles away from the desired result. I realized I am being over critical of my work. May be looking at that better image will help me feel better about what I have done already and make my day :-) Well its night now and the gr8 news is this helped.....I had a good, constructive day. Moral of the story is spend a lot of time in the shower when you are lost.....hopefully you will find some answers....

In the shower...

I have been thinking of starting my own blog for quite some time now... This probably is what everyone says in their first post...rather cliched! Okay, the reason I was hesitant to start it was what to write or better put, what is there to write that no one has written before? So many people, so many blogs, so many opinions, reviews....everything I feel or say is probably felt or written already.... So, is it worth the trouble to write and bore others by repeating stuff? I got an answer to this today morning when in the SHOWER.... What I feel may not be something new, but there would be somethings I experience for the first time that change how I think or perceive the people or surroundings around me. It would be fun to write them down and just read them after a while....interesting... Also, if I ever decide to share this blog details with my friends or family, they will discover my thought process.... Yes, since I got a good reason now to start a blog, I hope I will keep posting anything interesting that I come across or conjure up...